Now, I'm not so naive to think Mr. Tennant shall ever read this...and I reckon trutfully that he wouldn't give a rat's bottom how I feel--geez, get real, I'm not anybody...so, anyway, since I very literally just spent my last dollar, I can't afford any overseas postage just now to write him a fan letter, ha-ha, so I will just have to blog this to no one in particular.
This is probably going to come off really sappy and pathetic, so it's just as well the actor will never read it, by the way. I'm not even sure why I'm blogging this, except that I just want to say it and get it out, 'cos I've no one here would want to hear it--I told Bonnie Prince Charlie, but he just yawned and rolled his big ol' rotund ginger and white body over--think of a cross between a sea lion and a beached whale with fur-- and then proceeded to wash himself in a spot that probably would make some men rather envious (or is that too much information?). Cats are very self-centred creatures sometimes, aren't they?
Sorry to digress. Back to the main subject: David Tenannt Leaving Dr Who
I've been a dedicated Whovian for exactly 25 years. I was shattered when they took it off the air, and elated would be a beggarly word, to describe how I felt when I learned, in winter of 2006, that it had been brought back--and was coming to America.
The timing of Dr Who coming back into my life, simply couldn't have been better, if it had been planned that way. Having only just lost my mum, having spent a very hard winter in abject poverty--living on benefits alone, and spending every day for over 2 months , hunting for a job--even the day we buried my mum, I was at the state job service office, hopefully browsing their listings for jobs...but it was so hard.
My first Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays, totally alone and without funds...no proper heat or hot water in my home...about the time mum died, first the propane gas furnace and then the hot water boiler, died completely. Then I got the foreclosure notice for my caravan...not a good winter at all, that.
Eventually I got a job--and was tickled that Dr Who would be shown on Sci-fi, during my break time at work--our employee lounge at the race track/casino had a 40 inch television set. Oh the joy!!!
Anyway, I found out Eccleston was leaving, and saw photos of this new guy--whom, unlike Eccleston, I'd never heard of before---and I decided to wait and see...long wait. I didn't get my first glimpse of David Tennant until mid-July of 2006. But...wow. Okay, I was VERY impressed. He grabbed me right from the get-go.
I saw in Mr. Tennant, an actor who was so incredibly versatile...funny and sinister and sad and all-powerful---sometimes almost all at once. Amazing!
There is nothing I like more to see in any actor/actress, than range...the ability to lay the soul bare for all to see, to laugh, to cry, to dance upon the wings of human emotion--and wow, tennant had that, and more.
Over the last couple of years, Doctor Who has taken me places I never could go on my own. It's taken me out of my grief, my hardships, and those continual upsets and bad news--and, the ever-looming spectre of my worst nightmare: homelessnes.
Well, most of you regulars know about that, just from following my blog for the last two years--Doctor Who literally SAVED me. That's a long and, like the rest of this, not a terribly interesting story, but it's true, I swear it...in an off-hand way, Dr Who very literally kept me from killing myself.
I had lovely, lovely friends (you know who you are) who sent me copies of the series--which I otherwise would never have seen, as I don't have television and no way could I ever afford the DVD's, not in a zillion years, not on my income--anyhow, I don't want people to think I'm feeling sorry for myself, or trying to elicit sympathy, 'cos I'm not. I'm just trying to give some exposition here, some background as to why I am so sad about Tennant's departure. It's NOT because I'm a fan-girl (and the first person who calls me one, gets a virtual pie thrown in his or her face)
David Tennant's Doctor took me on a magic carpet ride--it was almost like 25 years ago, when I first began watching Tom Baker's Doctor--having never heard of, nor seen Dr Who, nor being an anorak--the ride to fandom back then was truly delicious!
And, Tennant brought back that feeling. When I literally had nothing else in the world to smile about, hearing that Dr Who theme, and knowing that this skinny Scottish bloke in a fab long brown coat, wonky suit and trainers was going to come dashing out the Tardis doors to whisk me away from my troubles, was a gift, truly it was.
And now, knowing that as of January, the ride will be over forever...saddens me more than you could possibly know. Another loss--and yes, it IS a loss for me...it tires me knowing I'm losing yet another thing (well, I'm not calling Tennant a 'thing,' I'm referring to the 10th Doctor here) that I care about from my life.
Yes, I know there'll be another Doctor--this one under the brilliant pen and producing of Steven Moffatt. And yes, I DO understand completely, Tennant's reasons for leaving--he's an intelligent man, and he is probably quite right in his logic. Still, it doesn't make the loss any less.
Tennant will move on, and I hope every role he encounters will give him the satisfaction and reward that he craves from his craft. Still...I will be here, in Glens Falls, just me and the cats and a dead-end telemarketing job...and no more tenth Doctor to look forward to...and yeah, I know it's probably pretty pathetic of me, but it does make me feel very empty, alone and sad--I feel the loss tonight, sorry.
