I Ain't Afraid of No Daleks

1. Who's the black sheep in your family?
My slightly older sister.

2. Do you take your coffee black?
Only as an absolute last resort--if I desperately need to stay awake. My preference is lots of cream, no sugar.

3. Do you own a Blackberry?
I used to pick wild blackberries...oh, you mean that newfangled electronic gadget? What is that, anyway? I honestly don't know what it is or does...never even seen one.

4. Which black forest would you rather eat - cake or ham?
Ham--'cos I'm just a big ol' ham anyway...and I could take or leave chocolate.

5. Have you ever had a black eye?
Yeah, twice. Once when a horse swung his head into my face, and once when my sister clocked me, during an argument.

"Does this expression make me look super gorgeous and sexy--or merely like I need a laxitive and I'd just stuck my finger in an electrical outlet?"

Really, though...I assume that with all the work he does--even after taxes and bills, that the man's got to have wads of money--can't he afford a comb and some hair gel?

Hullo all,

It's ten to eight in the morning over here. Looks like it's shaping up to be a hot day. It's 80 F in my bedroom, already. I really hate the hot weather. Give me 15 F and a pair of snowshoes any day, ha-ha.

We start a new selling script at work today...the pre-campaign pep talk went something like this..."We've had a lot of hang-ups on this so far, and only made one sale in two days...the client wants one sale an hour..." Got any other good news? Well, at least our trainer was honest about it.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to sound cheerful, upbeat and positive, when you are suffering from depression, anemia fatique, and generally feel like cr*p? Oh, I can do this in my sleep--practically have, actually, but not a lot of fun, mateys.

This has been a an out bout of depression--usually I can tell when I am being nailed by it...just like can tell if I'm starting to get manic. Manic is easier though, for me to manage, as it is so rare for me. I have learned to cope without the assistance of the bored, uninterested, overworked state-provided therapists. And, without the meds, which self-same therapists like to play around with and change, every time I was assigned someone new. Like my wonky brain was their own personal science experiment.

I've asked the PA at the health center twice about getting back into therapy or something...basically ignored. She'll say--whenever the need to see another specialist or something comes up--"Oh sure, we can take care of that..." And promptly does NOTHING. No one likes PA's. In fact, some guy was arrested in the ER the other day, for throwing around chairs and causing a hole to be punched in the wall, because he was furious over the hospital assigning him a physician's assistant, instead of a proper doctor. Oh, there's some really good PA's out there, don't get my wrong. But, many are just not really up to par, unfortunately. Equally unfortunate, is that most poorer patients, such as myself, are literally forced to either see a PA--or no one at all...except maybe a nurse--in fact, most nurses are preferable to many PA's.

Well, opened the door to the front room this morning, and was greeted by the stench that is Glens Falls, wafting through my open window. The fumes from the paper mill and the rank mustiness of the Hudson River, on damp nights/mornings, gives off a smell that's somewhat like a giant's big wet fart. Not the nicest odour to wake to, first thing in the morning.

I noticed that Aol is down again...what a piece of junk that is, ey?

Well, have to convince my stomach that it really wants breakfast this morning...then convince myself that I really do want to go to work, today.

Cheers, Nancy G.

I know lots of people don't believe in religion, and certainly one has to respect that--for you can't respect your own beliefs, if you have no respect for others...I am of the thought that respect is a symbiotic relationship. You cannot have one without the other.

Yet, I do think, no matter what your beliefs in life--or the afterlife, that nearly every human being has a soul.

We have our senses: sight, touch, smell, hearing. And, we have our brains.

We see things, and sometimes don't notice them...and sometimes we do. Sometimes, a tree is just a tree, and a sky is just a sky...and sometimes, not.

Humans have this tendency to make connections with things. Now, partly, I think it's just our natural age-old need to make sense out of our world.

But, sometimes we go beyond just connecting, sometimes our hearts and spirits and souls reach out, and find the picturesque, the harmonious, the moving, the delightful.

I don't believe that this is merely us trying to make a logical connection. It's more than that, oh, so much more. I believe that when our senses are naturally heightened---on those all too rare occasions when humans are truly in tune with their surroundings---that there's some sort of magical trinity at work, where our heart and inner-spirit and soul, somehow connect with each other.

We see colours and movements, hear sounds, smell the scents, all that is around us, and something just clicks. And suddenly, the world isn't just something we take for granted, or something to find logic in. Our mind takes in the information, but then we don't just process it, our experience at that moment, it actually becomes a part of ourselves, a part of who we are, as an individual. It changes us imperceptibly, subtly guiding us to a place where we can feel contentment and/or belonging.

I don't know if I'm right, if any of this makes sense at all. These are things that I experienced as far back as my teens, but never really could put words to...even now, this lame attempt to verbalize something that has no real corporeal substance...words are beggars to me.

Such are the thoughts of a closet transcendentalist.

It's ten minutes to midnight, and I must be off to bed. Have a really lovely Tuesday, all.