Well, it's Monday, ey?

I walked to work three times today, and three times have been sent home---both the phone lines and the computer system that runs the programmes are down. May not have work tomorrow, either, if they can't fix things...even the copier is acting up, I guess. It's all going haywire here, today.

Means I have to work Friday--normally, these days, a day off. It's useful having two days off, now. That way, if I miss time during the week, it's much easier to squeeze in the time to make the work hours up, later.

Thankfully, it was a super nice day, today, so I had no reason to be grumpy about all that wasted time. I needed the excersize and it really was gorgeous (well, as nice as it can be, in February, in Glens Falls, NY, ha-ha).

It's hard, being stuck home with so little entertainment, and pretty much the only human contact being, co-workers, cab drivers and till clerks. About ten years ago, I used to be a Meals on Wheels volunteer, for about three years in the 90's. I remember going into people's homes, and seeing them sitting there, often alone, watching daytime television or simply staring out the window.

I used to feel so bad for them. In fact, that's what spurred me on to try and save for a car, and to apply for aid to go to college full-time.

I was on disability, and not working--just doing volunteer work and looking after the apartment and my mum. There were few jobs for women, in the rural village where I was living, at the time...mostly till clerk and waitressing or hairdressing jobs. I managed to work at the local animal shelter for a bit, and then, after getting a car, I got a part-time jobs at the local Six Flags amusement park and also another animal shelter. And, I went to college for my 2 year degree in Liberal Arts/Humanities (with an eye on going on two or three more years for my 4 year BA in either theater management or journalism/communications).

Anyway, I used to fret that that (being alone at home with nothing much to do/little human contact) this would happen to me. And..it has. This is my life, my future, and it scares me, sometimes.

I'd give anything, literally sell my soul to the devil, to have something--anything, to hold on to. Just to have something momentus (in a good way) happen. Some straw of hope to grasp!

A day like today, gosh--I'd have loved to be out driving in my car, walking in the country, riding a horse, snowshoeing, visiting a historic house or musem, shopping at the mall (now you know that I'm really desperite), ANYTHING. Even telemarketing!

Well, I can live with it--have to, don't I? But it is its own sort of hell, sometimes, I must say.