Another day, another boring post.
And, a day that was totally wasted. The one thing I needed most to do, today, didn't happen--I needed to find out what happened to bulk of my rent money--but the bank's computers were down.
The sands of time are not only running down, they're slipping through my fingers faster than I can see them! Some days, I really do feel like my life is just one big waste of time. Seriously.
I'm seriously miffed at Time-Warner Cable. Not only did I always pay my bill on time--never even a half-day late--I often paid it early! Yet, I'm ONE BLINKING DAY late, paying the bill, and they yank my phone service! I have a dial tone, but I when I dial, there's no ring, and consequently, the phone will ring, but no one is there on the other end--just dead air. I wrote them, but they have yet to respond, other than that automated spam telling me they got my e-mail. Nice to know these chav big companies really appreciate their customers, ey? Ted Turner may be famous, but, judging by the way he treats his customers, like the guys that run Wal-Mart--he's still a blue collar bimbo. You can take some of these people outta' the wrong side of the tracks--but you can't take the wrong side of the tracks outta' them. Breeding does show--whether you are poor, middle class or rich, your behaviour will always reflect your entire family's background, thoughout the ages--and don't you think not!
OLD MONTGOMERY WARD DEPARTMENT STORE BULIDING (1920'S-1982) IN MY OLD HOMETOWN--MY DAD'S PLACE OF WORK WAS RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET FROM THIS, OUR VILLAGE SCHOOL WAS ON THE HILL BEHIND THE STORE.
I mean, ancestry wise, I'm half-chav/blue collar fresh off the boat from Ellis Island eastern Europen stock, and half American upper middle-class white, stolid, Anglo-Saxon Protesant. And it shows, sometimes. My dad's family were/are very rough around the edges, stoic, insecure, hard-working types. Not saying that's a bad thing--most of dad's family did very well for themselves, but are insecure about their wealth and not really comfortable around their better relations. I don't mean "better" in the negative sense--just what dad's family perceived as "better"---better as in upbringing and stuff. I don't mean for a minute that mum ever, ever, thought she was better than them--quite the opposite. It was dad's family who had this attitude towards mum--which mum admitted puzzled her to no end, as she never thought of herself as anything special or out of the ordinary.
They were raised in a tenement in the heart of the depression. Now mum, only child, her family did fine, during the depression--her dad had a good job (pressman for NY Daily News), they had a stable home life, went on holidays, had a car and all that. And mum's family came from wealth, whereas dad's family were, to be blunt, Polish peasants. Dad's family were good people, but very closed, emotionally and, as I said rather insecure, emotionally and financially. They didn't like mum, most of them, which hurt mum considerably.
Dad's only family members that really spent time with mum, well, two had married into the family, my aunt Frieda, from Germany, and my aunt Dolly. My aunt Ann--or Nana, she liked mum. Mum always cared about Nana, despite her rough ways (Nana yelled a lot--she was quite tetchy, but then so was the whole family) and Nana's only "hobby" was Pro-wrestling. Nana used to work at a tool and die factory, and spent her weekends baby-sitting us, in-between watching the likes of Gorgeous George and other famous wrestlers, on tele. Dad's family (with the exception, unfortunately, of dad) placed a high value on hard work and money. Well, to be honest, dad did go for the money part, quite a lot. He was obsessed with it. Never had any, mind, but he loved it all the same. Dad's family were into material things--owning and/or running businesses, having professional careers, that sort of thing. Dad's family were close-minded, as well. Not in a mean way, necessarily, just they felt intimidated by those who didn't fit into their ideas of what was acceptable or what was "normal." Basically, anyone or anything who wasn't like "them."
Mum's family placed an emphasis on being together, doing things together. They valued manners and doing things for others, things like that. They were very old school--not stuffy, no. Just had retained those values that were passed on by their Victorian ancestors. Although not college educated, they placed a high value on education. But mostly, family was important to them, and their surroundings--again, not stuffy--they lived in a perfectly ordinary house on a typical suburban street. But, their whole existance centred on home and family. They had nice things--the look of the home, the homieness of it, was important to them--not so much the value of the possesions, but the meaning and feel behind them. Mum would relate how her mum and gran would carefully shop for a new piece of furniture or knick-knack. Again, not for intrinsic value, so much as for how it would improve the atmosphere of the home. Unlike dad's family, mum's was very accepting of those who were different. Grandad and great-grandad were not only pressmen, but had been other things as well, stone cutters and policemen. Grandad especially, often mingled with people different from himself, having to live and work in the heart of New York City during the week, coming home to Hudson only one weekends. And that rubbed off. Mum wasn't always comfortable with things like gays and itnerracial marrages--but, she accepted it, nonetheless. And, after a bit, she became friends with a gay man in our village, and forgot her predjuices. She never was entirely at home with interracial dating--she came right out and told me that, when I breifly dated a black guy, in my late 20's--but she treated my friend with courtesy and never let on to her true feelings when he was around. Actually, she admitted to me once, that she was ashamed for feeling that way--but that was just her generation's attitude. I've found most people her age feel the same.
In a nutshell, mum and dad were oil and water. In every way, shape and form. But, often, I see traits from both my family background, creeping up on me. Knowing my mother's ancestry--and all the times she spoke to me of her experiences growing up, and what Nana and dad and others told me of dad's family, growing up, one begins to see patterns emerging--long, longstanding patterns, going back, perhaps, for many generations...who knows?
HISTORIC SCHUYLER MANSION, IN THE SOUTH END OF THE CITY OF ALBANY, NY. COLONIAL HOME OF REVOLUTIONARY HERO GEN. SCHUYLER. MUM DRAGGED US HERE MANY A RAINY SATURDAY. THERE'S STILL A TOMAHAWK SCAR ON A RAILING INSIDE.
On to other things.
It was a lovely day, but I spent much of it in the loo, as I've picked up the bug that's been going 'round the office. I suppose a lunch of leftover cold spaghetti and meat sauce didn't help any.
My stomach is telling me it's hungry, but I've not much felt like eating, the last 24 hours. My culinary choices are getting thin, it being the end of the week. I've just some hot dogs and tinned tuna, eggs and sausage, beans, and a thing of instant pancake mix. I've still a few potatoes left, so I suppose I could boil them with some eggs, and make some potato, egg, onion and mayonnaise salad, and have that with a hot dog or two. Or, I could make pancakes and sausage, or a tuna-mayo salad sandwich and some tinned soup. My dodgy stomach sort of says no, but there's not much else. Maybe beans on toast or franks 'N beans? Or the old egg and ketchup sandwich with some hashbrown potatoes? I've a box of parmesian noodle mix, I could add some tuna and peas to it, I suppose, make a casserole, of sorts. Or, I guess, if all else fails, there's apple jelly on toast, or a bowl of toasted honey-nut oats cereal.
To be perfectly honest, what I'm seriously craving, right now? Either a Dominos pepperoni Brooklyn style pizza, or Talk of the Town Tavern's half & half sausage (1/2 sliced link sausage, 1/2 sliced Kilbasa sausage) pizza. In that same vein, I could also make do with an Arby's Roast Beef and cheddar with secret sauce on an toasted onion bun with their cheesey potato puffs on the side, or, a Burger King Whopper and fries. Not that my stomach would thank me for them, either, ha-ha. Ah well, I can dream about junk food 'till the cows come home, but not going to happen. Too bad. I just got a great coupon from Dominos--three pizza's for only 5 dollars each--I could eat one and freeze the other two for later in the month--a good bargain.
Don't get me wrong, I like cooking--wouldn't have gone to culinary school, all those years ago, if I didn't. Given unlimited funds, I'd be cooking up a storm all the time--but home cooking, the kind from scratch, is very, very expensive. Fresh veg is high, even in summer, here, and meat...let's not go there. The price of groceries in escalating at a rate that New Yorkers like me, can't keep up with--every week, we have to eat less and less--and our nutritious foods? Ha! Maybe, maybe not. Three weeks ago, a head of lettuce was 79 cents. Last week: $1.29. That's a heck of a jump, in a few weeks, when one is literally counting pennies--I mean, literally.
I got lucky this week, and was able to make one good hot meal. They had both speghetti sauce and my favourtie brand of pasta (capellini) on sale, for $1 each. And I managed to find a pound of ground chuck (fatty beef) for about $3 dollars (1 pound 50 p). I put aside about a quarter pound of the beef to use to make a hamburger with, and used the rest of the beef to cook and add to the jar of spaghetti sauce. So I had a couple of good meals this week. They also had a family size package of frozen macaroni and beef with tomato sauce, for the equivilent of about 75p, so I had that, for two meals, with a green salad the first time, and some tinned corn the next. So, I've not been eating too badly.
Or maybe, I just won't eat at all. I've had two plates of left over spaghetti today, and some green salad, so it's not like I've not eaten. Ah well. Decisions, decisions...
