I Ain't Afraid of No Daleks

Well, my computer has not been working right, since I installed Mozilla. Copy and paste is suddenly really iffy, and seems to have a mind of its own. Arggh! Going to try this again...not sure it's worth it, but, I need something to do, tonight.

"Waugh! What did you have for lunch, David? A haggis milkshake?"

"So, let me get this straight. I'm still the headmaster, but now you're the naughty housemaid?"

"Freema just called me 'David Teninch.' I love this job!"

"Why are you laughing, Freema? WHAT?!!? You thought 'teninch' was the size of my feet?"

There are times when I think on giving up blogging. But then, when I stop, even for a day, I feel--empty. I think it's not only the voicing of my pain and fear, worry and unhappiness--but also giving voice to happier memories and some of my more esoteric thoughts, that I normally cannot share with those around me. Blogging makes me feels more human, less isolated, and gives me a reason to get up in the morning.

It's knowing, as well, that I am not alone. To quote Shakespeare:

"When we our betters see bearing woes,
we scarcely think our miseries our foes,
who alone suffers, suffers most i' the mind,
leaving free things and happy shows behind;
But then the mind much sufferance doth o'erskip,
when grief hath mates, and bearing fellowship..."

Thank you to all my blog friends, not just for taking the time to read and to care--but also to share with us, your own cares and joys.

Question:

If you could go back and give yourself some advice at age 15, what would you tell your younger self?

Me: Stay away from creditors. Pay cash for everything!

Well, woke up this morning to a resounding racket outside---"what the heck???" I yelled, waking up all over. Well...today I can't say the parade passed me by....the racket was the Glens Falls High School marching band.

Followed by every kid in every local baseball team, every kid in every local scouting troop, veterans--lots of veterans, the junior band, antique cars, misc stuff, motorcycles, the two local pipe bands...and the fire departments--and then, I burst out crying, because suddenly, watching the volunteer firemen marching in their dress unimorms (God, how many volunteer fireman's parades did I sit through waiting for dad to march by?) And abruptly, without warning--for the first time since his funeral--I seriously missed my dad....I looked down from my balcony at the firemen marching seriously, in their white gloves and posh dress, and remembered my dad like that, and had to run inside (not easy to do, as the window to the balcony is 2 and a half feet off the ground) an bawl. Suddenly, in the midst of a pleasant sunny morning--my heart broke with sheer grief.

But...I'm mostly over it. I'm okay. It just took me by surprise, a little.

There was a local rock band, pounding out some 70's rock from a flatbed trailer being hauled behind a pick up truck--and I got back outside in time to see the last of the fire engines, and, always my favourite, the horses--bless them. Love the horses. I like to look and see which people in the group know how to ride, and which ones are going to need a good hot soak after the parade, ha-ha. There was a young Percheron drawing a four-wheeled surrey, a girl on a nice little pony, assorted adults on horseback, a cowboy, and a really beefy guy mounted on a Clydesdale gelding. And then there was a Glens Falls police car and...parade was over.

But wait, there's more....back down the street came the rock band, all alone on their trailer, still playing and singing their hearts out--well, this has been a different morning, at any rate.

Veteran's parading

American firemen in parade dress

Just saw a bit of a clip from the latest Dr Who episode, "Human Nature." Wow. I'm on tenter hooks waiting to see this! Oh, the sci-fi element seems to be there--but whoa, hold on, is that straight-up, proper acting I'm watching? Love it! Wow, these two can really act their hearts out! Bravo Mr. Tennant and Ms. Agyeman, bravo!

It is a question which has plagued humans for thousands of years, caused philosophers to spend hours, confined in dim and dusty spaces, in ceaseless mental labour. Some have turned to every new idea as the ultimate answer--and find themselves later, turning away, again--looking for the next new thing, like a bored child with a room full of toys that he or she no longer cares for. Some unfortunates, at the last, find the search too much effort, and end up turning to alcohol and/or drugs, in order to superficially bury their questing souls.

Through the course of time, people have scaled insurmountable mountains and and crossed trackless wastes, virtually driveing themselves mad, searching for the answer to one question: Who am I?

Some say that we were made in the image of God. Perhaps, but sometimes, when I think on the wars, and abuse and murders, the hateful things we say and do to each other--sometimes I think, that the image is flawed--perhaps even shattered, in some cases.

In the Film, Star Wars, there's a continual reference to "The Force." A life-essence that flows from all living things.

Now, I've no idea if there is--or ever was--such a thing. But, I do think there's more to life--to being alive, then we humans can possibly know. I do believe that we have a soul. And, to go against the bible slightly, I do believe that other things have at least something akin to a soul, as well. There are ghosts, yes. And there's something more, out there. All around us, there is life. There is an intangible energy--charged and flowing out from the life around us. Well, I don't actually know this for a fact--but, that said, I have felt...something, at times, while in the presence of nature...something that truly defies explanation. To risk sounding blasphemous again, that feeling is so centered and so positive--it's almost like being in the presence of God.

I once was walking down a city street--not a bit of lawn or garden in sight--and saw a little corn stalk, growing up through the sidewalk. Just recently, here in glens falls, I saw a tree seedling trying to take root in an eighth of an inch of soil, right on the very edge of a busy city thoroughfare. Life is an amazing thing. It's tenacious. Oh, the climate can change, and man can destroy, and some life has, and will continue to, disappear. But...still, the struggle to live, to grow, to be something more--a tall tree from a seedling, a caring and thinking person from an automaton going through the motions--life struggles, life breathes, life--lives. The earth is alive, a great symphony of life, and we are part of the chorus.