Well, going to keep this short.
This morning, the landlord and his prospective buyers (one assumes) were to do a walk-through of the apartments in the building--well and good--except moi hadn't washed or Hoovered her floors in nearly two weeks. I'd just been sweeping the kitchen floor, that's all. Well, last night, I had meant to do that, but was busy, during my lunch break, trying to look for jobs, and trying to make some calls--and by the time I got home, Thursday night from work, I was really knackered...just did the washing up and sorted some laundry for Saturday's trip (now postponed 'till Monday) to the laundromat. Guess I should have made the time to do the floors.
The start time at work had be shifted up to 11am, and the walk-through was at 10, supposedly--they never did show up, at least, as far as I know. So, after quickly vacuuming the front sitting room, and my bedroom, I shifted to the kitchen and bath. Did a quick damp mop, ran a rag over the counters...went to go back into the front room, to pull a shirt out of the closet there...and took a header on the kitchen floor. My God! It hurt like hell! I felt something actually snap in two---turns out it wasn't a bone, thank God. After working the phones at work 3 hours, I found, when I went to use the loo, that walking was no longer an option--sent to the ER by the supervisor--who kept looking at me as if I was mad for even coming in to work at all----and bob's yer uncle, I went out of the office on a stretcher.
Seems I very much may have ripped the hell out of some ligament(s) and/or tendon(s)...and got as bad a sprain as I've ever had (makes #7 for the feet/ankle area)...same foot with a permanantly distorted ankle, from a bad sprain 8 years ago.
Well, I'm up the ol' brown creek with out a paddle--and a leaky canoe, as well.
I'm in agonizing pain--just the simple act of turning over in bed, or walking through the kitchen to the loo, is sheer torture.
I have to go up my two flights of stairs on my bum---found out the stairs are too narrow for my crutches--which I don't use very well, as I'm still recovering from the mild sprain to my left knee and ankle from my fall in the blizzard, 16th of March.
As if my life isn't already becoming a living hell--now I've this to contend with. cooking for myself, laundry, shopping, banking--it's all going to be hell. And, to make matters worse, because of the cut in hours--I'm now going to have to go back to working 7 days a week. Not much chance of a rest, for me. I can't take out the rubbish, I'll have to pay someone to do it--have to pay 6 dollars or more a day, for a cab, can't afford the pain meds the ER doc prescribed to me, can't afford the orthopedist--or the cab fare there, since he's moved to the suburbs. I've still the Soc. Sec.thing and student loans to take care of, and now, seeing about getting that assembly line job--the one that pays 13 dollars an hour, full time, with benefits and pension--is completely out of the question.
And, I can't see the new Doctor Who--least of my worries, I know, but...it's the one thing that really gives me something to look forward to--well, that and "talking" with my few friends.
Life is fast becoming untenable, for me. How can I not see myself as a loser? How can I not feel down? How long can I keep this up, and still retain some semblance of sanity?
jackgrope
You sound like you could do with a BIGGGGGGG HUGGGGG.
Don't give up just yet, ok?
J